Lonely Men Built Lonely Cities

How Tina Fey Saved the World

Fri Nov 7, 2008 5:06 PM EST

"We need a superhero", I said to myself one morning as my television announced yet another crisis to strike at America's ignorantly weak knees.

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us-news, tina-fey, sarah-palin, superhero, thank-you

I'm a 19-year-old Liberal, And I have One Question.

Fri Nov 7, 2008 4:45 PM EST

The first thing you might think is, "Well of course you're a liberal. You're 19! Everything is new and fresh and exciting.

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us-news, gay-marriage, prop-8, california, utah, liberal

323

An Open Letter to the US Stock Market, From the US Economy

Wed Sep 17, 2008 7:05 PM EDT

Dear Stock Market, I'm sorry.

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us-news, open-letters-dont-really-work, maybe-they-do-though, the-united-states, economy, stock-market, wall-street, appology

A Short Imagined Monologue From The Bee That Stung Me On The Sidewalk

Thu Aug 28, 2008 8:05 PM EDT

Stay cool. That's the key, just pretend you're looking for flowers, buzzing low to the ground. Good. He doesn't see you yet. Maybe he won't see you - if you're that good at this. But who's to know.

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i-was-stung-by-a-bee-today, odd-news

The Quality of the Vine, or, Why Everybody Should Stop Complaining

Fri Aug 1, 2008 4:09 AM EDT

I only have four measly branches on my vine, I spend more time on Facebook than I do bushwhacking through people's seeds (it's actually open in another tab at this very moment), I get paid less than two dollars a month to continue silently skimming science and odd news articles w …

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us-news, newsvine, immigrants, msnbc, elitists-on-high-horses, partly-satire-if-anybody-sees-this-tag

College Thoughts: The End of Year One

Wed Jul 23, 2008 12:12 PM EDT

This morning, amid my delicious Eggo waffles and orange juice, I was hit with the urge to ponder my crossing of the rickety bridge between high school and college. With some time to spare before I peddled off to work, I re-read my thoughts on my high school experience .

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college, freshman-year, seattle-university, waffles, facebook, us-news

3 Easy (Legal) Ways to Save Money on Gas This Summer

Tue Jun 10, 2008 8:36 PM EDT

It's summer time (well, almost) and we all find ourselves driving more and more as these days grow hotter and longer.

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us-news, gas, money, saving-you-money, walk, run, ride, dance

Students Want Guns on Campus

Fri Mar 14, 2008 10:45 PM EDT

I was casually sifting through my college's attempt at a newspaper one morning before class when I was struck by a certain piece of their base journalism.

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us-news, schools, shootings, college, guns, weapons, concealed-carry, sccc, university-of-washington, seattle-university

Why Nader Is Getting My Vote

Sun Feb 24, 2008 6:46 PM EST

Underdog stories are meant for America. Think about it - the colonies vs the British, the Giants vs the Patriots, David vs Goliath. We eat up these stories like they're the last slice of our mom's pie that has the secret recipe that her mother's mother used.

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us-news, satire, ralph, nader, democrats, republicans, presidential-race, hokey-pokey

Hillary Clinton: The Femme Fatale of American History, or, Why I Feel Bad for Bill

Fri Feb 22, 2008 11:37 AM EST

Let me start this off by saying that this article is long overdue. So much so that the points I am trying to make are obscure at best, but then again, that is up to you and your imagination to decide.

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us-news, hillary, clinton, bill-clinton, presidential-campaign, plagiarism, femme-fatale, satire

Today is Ansab's Birthday

Thu Dec 13, 2007 1:37 PM EST

Today is my dear friend Ansab's 67th birthday. He is a fine fellow and a remarkable young man. I wish him all the best because he deserves nothing but. In honor of this national holiday, I've written you a song, the lyrics go a little something like this:

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us-news, ansab, birthday, song

There is no Title for This.

Sun Dec 2, 2007 1:02 AM EST

This is my intro that tells you there is no intro. I just want to talk.

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us-news, snow, ice, raincoats, and-things

Movie Review - Beowulf

Mon Nov 19, 2007 2:17 PM EST

By Mykola Bilokonsky (Clipped by Mike V.)

With cutting edge computer generated animation, a roguishly regal Anthony Hopkins, a mostly-naked Angelina Jolie, a script co-written by Neil Gaiman and an original narrative source dating back 1500 years, the new Beowulf movie has to be good...right?

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entertainment, beowulf, movie-review, movies, cinema, neil-gaiman, literature, review, angelina-jolie, anthony-hopkins

Books You DO NOT Want Made Into Movies

Mon Nov 19, 2007 12:45 PM EST

You can't avoid it. The cinemas are taking over.

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us-news, movies, cinema, film, books

An Open Letter to People Who Write Open Letters

Sun Nov 11, 2007 9:53 PM EST

Dear Authors of Open Letters, You need to stop. It's that simple, just stop writing these goddamn open letters.

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satire, open-letters, us-news, letter, stop-it, pony-express

Life, Epiphanies, and the Necessity of Dirty Dishes

Sat Nov 10, 2007 6:20 PM EST

People throw around the word "epiphany" anticipating its flight to capture the interest of an audience like a battered frisbee entertaining a canine.

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us-news, life, epiphanies, clean, food, rollin-in-my-caddilac-theory, broken-hearts, relationships, dirty-dishes

The Social Construction of "Race"

Thu Oct 25, 2007 6:13 PM EDT

Humans, for as long as cognitive expression has existed, have responded to their inherent responsibility to classify and compartmentalize the world around them. This ill-founded obligation we so readily accept has proven helpful in some endeavors while disastrous in others.

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us-news, race, racism, socio-anthropology, mitchondrial-dna, dna, homo-sapiens, variation, humans, genetics

Socrates, Halo, Scarface, Space Nazis, Corrupting the Youth, The Global War on Terror and the State of the Arts (and I Agree With Jack Thompson)

Wed Oct 17, 2007 7:35 AM EDT

By TomPitysFools (Clipped by Mike V.)

In the days surrounding the launch of Halo 3, the game has been railed by critics innumerable for its "disturbingly violent" content.

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halo, halo-3, violence, socrates, video-games, jack-thompson, space-nazis, entertainment, videogames, xbox

Cowboys > Politicians

Wed Sep 26, 2007 2:42 PM EDT

America would not be if it weren't for cowboys. These swashbuckling heroes aided in the evolution of our country in ways greater than the invention of the lightbulb, railroad, and iPod combined. "How?" you ask, "Aren't our nations cowboys thieves, murderers, and scoundrels?" Nay.

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us-news, cowboys, politicians, white-house, satire, carbon-footprints, environment, demon-rum

Sag Your Pants. Period.

Mon Sep 17, 2007 10:36 PM EDT

No matter what style of clothing you decide to wear, being subject to some giant fashion generalization is as unavoidable as dropping your iPod.

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us-news, pants, schools, mtv, prison, trends, satire-barely

Religious Presidents and Gay Marriage

Mon Sep 10, 2007 1:26 AM EDT

America can't function without Presidents. Hell, most people can't function without some inkling of a President's superiority cradling their lofty, fragile desires. For many, a President's religion must be as much a part of them as their wake of mislead and broken promises.

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us-news, united-state, president, government, homosexuals, gay-marriage, constitution

You Say Duct Tape Bandit, I Say Superhero

Thu Aug 16, 2007 2:38 AM EDT

It's late afternoon in Ashland, Kentucky. Temperatures skyrockets as people flee for the inviting safe haven of an air conditioned room or perhaps a shadow casted from the nearest tree. Mouths are parched behind dry lips while a man steps into Shamrock Liquors.

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odd-news, duct-tape, bandit, robbery, ashland, kentucky, crazy-tape, kasey, mr-steel, kid-mills

Barry Bonds is Still A Shmuck

Thu Aug 9, 2007 1:41 AM EDT

We all know that there's always "big" news overshadowing news that should truly be the top story of the day. The celebrities come out of their mansions long enough to screw their lives up badly enough to make the front page.

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sports, barry-bonds, 756, homeruns, hank-aaron, baseball, steroids, mlb

High School Thoughts (Part 3) The Final Chapter + Ansab

Wed Jun 20, 2007 8:14 PM EDT

It's over. Finally, truly, and subtly over. The high school chapter of my life has closed with the slightest flinch of a page turning, never again to be read for the first time. From now on there are only incomplete sparknoted summaries on what was and what could have been.

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us-news, high-school, graduation, ansab, friends, parents, teachers, heat-stroke, seattle, college

High School Thoughts (Part 2)

Sun Jun 10, 2007 6:51 PM EDT

I sincerely hoped I would update the churnings of my mind earlier than this but resisting the overbearing flow of my school week was futile. And so, like any good schoolboy, I sat quietly and completed my work instead of engaging in the beautiful escape that Newsvine offers.

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us-news, high-school, college, machines, give-me-a-job-please

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Comments & Feedback

I used to run into you all over the vine, and then I thought you disappeared. Apparently you haven't, now I'll have to subscribe so I stop missing things. Otherwise, we'll just have to put you on a leash.

— indecent

Write something on religion and you'll catch back up with me, vine brother.

— Yuriy Bilokonsky

I can't get around to Mike V.'s column often enough. He writes often amusing and interesting articles. One of my favorite writers on Newsvine.

— Yuriy Bilokonsky

If you actually do like piano jazz, try Paul Bley sometime.

— decoud

Latest Comments

Mother's 'horror show' as Facebook gatecrashers invade birthday party
Wed Dec 3, 2008
- The parents shouldn't have left. That's completely irresponsible.
Life is Short. Have an Affair.
Sun Nov 23, 2008
- Life is short. Experience Monogamy. 
Science's 10 Most Beautiful Experiments
Fri Nov 7, 2008
- good for you
Science's 10 Most Beautiful Experiments
Fri Nov 7, 2008
- Did you read this article 6 years ago?
Science's 10 Most Beautiful Experiments
Fri Nov 7, 2008
- did you really just comment on a six year old seed?
I'm a 19-year-old Liberal, And I have One Question.
Fri Nov 7, 2008
- I typed a capital letter F. You filled in the rest.
Utah faces boycott after Mormon work for Prop 8
Fri Nov 7, 2008
- This makes me sick. I think Newsvine should boycott LDS ads. I'm looking at one right now on the top of the page, and it makes be doubly sick.
How Tina Fey Saved the World
Fri Nov 7, 2008
- I think I may be in the same boat. 
Palin denounces her critics as cowardly
Fri Nov 7, 2008
- hahahaha

– Show More

Recent Votes

Scientists Make LED Bulbs From Salmon DNA
Source: Fast Company
University of Connecticut researchers have added fluorescent dye to salmon DNA and spun the DNA strands into nanofibers to create a brand new material that gives off a bright white light. A LED light is coated with the DNA nanofibers, and voila, a salmon DNA lightbulb is born.
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